I love process and the explorations, frustrations, joy and peace ignited in the art making process. For me the process is as important as the final work of art. Each piece holds the breath and energy of the artist in the tensions and release, the weight of the strokes, the subject matter, the color, the light, and tone. For me, my painting is that which I cannot see. It is the imagined, fantastical spaces of my daydreams. Abstracted scapes, objects, figures crafted through faded memories, hauntings, and the subconscious. Fantastical daydreams, disconnected desires, nostalgia that can never actually exist in the real. Even if the image is a distant memory, it is still unattainable. While my works focus in the desire, beauty, serenity, and longing that exists in dreams, nostalgia, and desire, there is a bit of despair and sadness hidden in the layers of each painting. I guess a bit of the human.
My artistic influences are many although most often I am drawn to the works of Georgia O’Keefe, Claude Monet, Kara Walker, and Jack Vettriano. My favorite painting is Umberto Boccioni’s “Dynamism of a Soccer Player.”
I was born in Arizona and spent my childhood in Texas and San Diego. I attended college in Seattle, Washington where I earned a B.A in Theatre. After college I spent a few years in Los Angeles before moving to Ft. Bragg, North Carolina. I moved back to San Diego in 2005 and have made my home here. I work from my home-based studio in Lemon Grove, California. The various places I have lived have influenced the ways in which my appreciation of landscapes in the largest of terms finds its way into my work. From the colors of the desert, to the sprawling skies of Texas, to the taste and smell of San Diego salty air …. each space holds tension, distortions, sensuality, and beauty.
Since returning to San Diego, I completed a Masters in Theatre Arts from San Diego State University and a PhD in Theatre History and Theory from the University of California, San Diego. As an advocate for life learning, I continue to take art classes at Art on 30th located in San Diego.
I first started painting in college. My college roommate was an art major. We would sit and paint, music in the background, exploring whatever came to mind. In 2015 my life changed. I was in the middle of my doctorate for theater history and theory. Up until this point, I was the Director of Operations for an Arts Center. I curated arts shows, managed several theatre, dance, and music acts, scheduling, booking, maintaining the space, fixing HVAC issues, etc.. I was also an international plus model signed with Wilhelmina models. I left it all to go to graduate school for theatre. But at the crux of 2015, tired and exhausted I began testing for what was wrong with me medically. After many tests, I was finally diagnosed with Hashimotos Thyroiditis. This diagnosis which took years to determine finally gave me answers to some of my manic energy levels - the very high and the very low- my newfound levels of both anxiety and depression, and how quickly thoughts and physical ability changed. This diagnosis forced me to look at my environment, personal relationships, and how I wanted to exist in the world. I went through quite a bit to get this diagnosis including swallowing a radioactive smoking pill (I felt like maybe it would give me super powers...it did not). My manic moments had increased. Dealing with levels of anxiety and depression I had never experienced, I tried to find something I could use as a survival mechanism. Over the years painting had been a private way to deal with stressful times. I began to paint daily and decided to share my work to the public. I received a beautiful, large easel as a gift. This present set something off in my soul. I created a studio space in my house for the easel and I painted. And I painted. And I painted. Something had been triggered. I continue to paint daily.
Every time I paint, I feel like I am securing a small bit of sanity for myself. Every painting is diving into a host of physical embodiments and emotional energetic charges. I don't shy away from darkness if it appears, I sink myself into it. I explore, I feel, I live. So perhaps not every abstract work is happy clouds and trees (those exist in my work too) but each painting is a living archive to a moment filled with emotion, space, and life. My breath is in each painting and I embrace the weights, the flaws, the shifts of each painting. My hope is that you might look at something and feel that moment in life and find the beauty that exists in the work for you.